Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome. Tonight’s episode 194 is entitled, “Security”. Are you the type of person who is always checking the doors to see if they're locked? Do you fear that your partner isn't always telling you the truth? Does your loved one always hold on to money and not want to splurge? Do you get a ton of phone calls and texts asking where you are and where you've been? We'll be talking about the emotional need of security this week at The Table.
What is it?
Oxford def - the state of being free from danger or threat.
LIR def - Ensuring harmony in life and relationships. This is both in regards to physical and emotional security.
What causes it?
Having it met constantly as a child
NOT having it met as a child
Experiencing relationship trauma
Being abandoned as a child
Being cheated on as an adult
Getting ghosted by friends
Always being dropped by significant others
Experiencing breaches in safety/trust
Break-ins/loss of property
How is it met?
Consistency of upbringing within parenting styles
Stability at home/peace
Constant and consistent meeting of and communication of desired needs
Conflicts are resolved in a productive manner
Fear/threats are encountered without catastrophic results
How are we hurt by not receiving it?
How do we “steal” it when it is not met?
Needs for reassurance
Checking on locks/doors excessively
Manic obsession with spending/finances
Withdrawal from “normal” activities
How can we meet one’s need for security?
When we do not receive belonging, how are we hurt?